Introduction Edit

Created at least 100 years ago in the Universe of Universe by SmarT Co. Inc. Industries, Mind Control Candy was used to take over (subject hometown here). The candy was blue flavour and therefore delicious, and after consumption it morphs into a blob which then travels through the bloodstream and creates a Bluetooth somewhere in the body (usually the mouth where such a device would go unnoticed, although they have been found in the pancreas and other places). After 9.99999999 (or roughly 10) hours the Bluetooth activates and takes over the body by reducing the host's mind to a little imaginary box (there are exceptions, see Express). It does this while emitting a soft hum somewhat, but not entirely unlike, a kitten caught in a concrete mixer. Paradoxically, sometimes it doesn't. The Bluetooth then searches for other Blueteeth within a 30m radius to connect with the SmarT central hub by drawing on power from neurons. However because it operates on the same frequency as iPods, it becomes confused and sulks a lot. Which means that connecting usually takes a bit of time - slightly longer than the connection time of a modem. According to The Association Of Incredibly Ignorant Idiots Who Think Everything Causes Cancer, Mind Control Candy is the only thing in all conceivable universes that does not directly cause cancer.

Manufacture Edit

The candy takes shape in factories all over the Universe of Universe. The candy itself is made out of used nanite fishing rods and ground up blue from blue mines found deep under Planet 54. The rest of the formula is only known to SmarT, however due to an untimely gust of wind the recipe got lost forever. After a duck ate it. This may be why SmarT began to lose power in the end.


Mind Control Candy has many variants, from the quick-acting to the tap-dancing. After the SmarT War of 2134 these secrets were released to the public (although it is unknown how much of this was propaganda).


Express Mind Control Candy works in seconds, rather than hours, due to a system which employs nanorobotic couriers to establish a global network over the host, which also uses broadband to connect to the hub. However the energy expenditure can visibly affect the host, and therefore is not good for covert missions.


Covert Mind Control Candy is designed to take subconscious control of the mind, and therefore use suggestion to control the host. This type of candy is used to take covert control, as the name suggests, of systems without raising suspicion.


Performance Mind Control Candy seems to have been created out of sheer malice, insanity, or both. When consumed, the host loses control of motor function and begins dancing. If the condition is not cured, the host will eventually die of exhaustion. Exactly what dance is danced depends on the host's mindset.

Curing the ConditionEdit

Surgical removal of the Bluetooth is usually enough to free the host. Cerschodnium also affects the Bluetooth, causing it to malfunction. Express Mind Control Candy hosts usually need to have a tailored virus sent into their network in order to free them. This usually consists of an installation of Microsoft Windows 3.1 by a trained professional, making the Bluetooth network vanish in a puff of utter virosity.

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